We are 3 months old today...

As I sit and look at our little boys, I'm nothing short of amazed. How on earth did those little 2 pounders turn into real little babies? Amazing. Although I never doubted that they would be normal babies someday, it was hard to picture what they would look like when they started to grow up. I still sit each day and stare at them in amazement...

Cole at 3 months old



JD at 3 months old



They both are thriving so well at home - and before we know it, they will be walking and talking. I'm doing my best to savor every, single moment.

At this point in their lives, they are developing more each day. They are starting to smile more. They are also starting to be awake much longer and stay alert. They look around much more and are visibly stimulated by music, noise and play. They are certainly opinionated about things now - Cole is a bit more "opinionated" than JD is. He makes his likes and dislikes known right away. When he's hungry, watch your fingers because he might just eat them if they get into his mouth! He loves to eat and does so with fury. Keep him fed, and he's a happy camper.

JD is a bit more patient; and absolutely loves his sleep! As evidenced by his photo, he's apparently storing nuts for the winter in his cheeks. Both boys love to snuggle and can't get enough of hugs and kisses.

We are so incredibly proud of our boys - they have come such a long way. With the holiday season upon us, it's a neat time to be able to reflect on where we've been and how far we've come. So much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to. We are lucky parents to have such wonderful, special Children. I feel so blessed each and every day. I hope I never forget this feeling and I also hope that I never, ever take our Sons for granted. They are special little people and I don't think I've ever loved something this much - ever.

Pucki & Gucki have arrived!

Who, you ask, are Pucki & Gucki? Well, you see, they are Santa's elves who have visited our family after Thanksgiving since I can remember. These two little Santa's helpers arrive on Thanksgiving Eve and stay until Santa comes on Christmas Eve and they can hop a ride back in the sleigh to the North Pole with him. After that time, their annual duty is done - until the next year.

Here they are, the cute little guys.


Pucki and Gucki come to watch the children and make sure that they are good and deserving of presents from Santa. They move about the house at will, and sometimes can be found to have left crumbs of food around the house or have changed their stance. They both are Steif Elves from Germany, purchased many years ago by my Grandparents - they stand about 7" tall and they have plastic faces and cloth/felt bodies. Their little eyes are painted on and I swear to this day, they follow you around the room when you look at them! They are always watching.

For years, my brother and I anxiously awaited Thanksgiving since the elves were coming. They would arrive and be perched on the clock or the Christmas wreath that hung on the hearth. We would run downstairs in the morning and there they were. And once they arrived, absolutely no more fighting. We were on our best behavior until Christmas. If we had to fight amongst each other, it was very quietly. And we would always be sure to write out our Christmas lists (in very small print) and fold them small enough so they would fit in the elves pouches. They would surely take them directly to Santa and we would be more likely to get what we wanted for Christmas.

The best part was that there was a BIG Gucki at our Grammy's house. So if we went there, we had to be extra good! He was the mac daddy Gucki. Needless to say, he has now moved to my Mom's house, the current Grammy. And my brother also has a Pucki and a Gucki - so the cousins will both have their own elves! Hat's off to whoever created this idea - it's ingenious. Not only is it a fun tradition for the kids, but anything to make kids behave over the holidays is one great idea.

I've waited many years to be able to share this tradition with my children - it's one of my fondest memories of childhood. I can't wait until the boys understand the story - and they can live that fun dream of being so special that Santa's elves actually come and stay at their house for a whole momth before Christmas! What a privelege! And what a way to keep them minding their p's & q's during such an exciting, crazy time for kids. In the meantime, until they are big enough to understand, we'll just continue to BELIEVE ourselves, in the magic of Christmas. It's much more fun that way!

Preemie Poem

(Thanks to Debbi - a fellow preemie Mom and a GREAT cheerleader!)

Preemie babies are angels sent from above, sent earlyto earth on a mission of love. They help us remember what life really means, not cars, not houses, not other expensive things.

They remind us of dreams for peace in our life and bring us together, husband and wife, aunts and uncles and daughters and sons. Leaving in the past any hurts we have done.

They remind us our touch can be used for good, to heal a small life when nothing else could. With their arrival of tiny hands and little feet, the world's not the same: it's a little more sweet.

(As seen published at the Connecticut Children's Medical Center NICU)

Our First Tandem Outing!

What a weekend! And the weather is so awesome - we were able to get the boys out for a long walk yesterday and today. They really enjoyed the fresh air - plus, it made them sleep extra well last night...always a plus!



We had a doctors appointment yesterday and Cole is up to 5 lb,11 oz now - he left the hospital at 5 lb,1 oz so he's growing well. JD is up to 8 lb,1 oz - apparently he's growing well too! Cole is actually eating like a champ. He's eating more than his brother is and in record time. JD has turned into quite the slow poke eater.

We feel so blessed that the boys are doing so well. Keep it up little guys! Hope you all are enjoying your Thanksgiving weekend. I know that we've had nothing but FOOTBALL on all weekend around here - the boys have been christened into the sports family! Can we just reiterate how nice it has been not to have to go to the hospital any longer?

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
Words will never be able to express how thankful we are for this day. You all have been such an instrumental part in getting us this far and we can never thank you enough for that. This is truly the best Thanksgiving ever in our book; what a special day.

Here are a few photos of our little turkey's;

Turkey #1 (Cole)



Turkey #2 (JD) - He ate too much turkey and the triptofan has started to kick in!





And here's a photo of the two of them side by side from yesterday. It never ceases to amaze me how different they look, yet they share so many of the same mannerisms. True Brothers!

We're Home (sorry for the delay!)

Whew...we made it!



We are knee deep in bottles and burp cloths and I LOVE IT! Daddy had to go to work today so Grammy and Great Aunt Kathy are here with me and we're watching babies eat sleep and poop. Oh how I've waited for this day.

It was an uneventful homecoming which is a good thing. We got home around 3pm yesterday and I spent the first hour just staring at the boys sitting in their seats together. JD was wide awake and not at all phased by Cole's arrival. Cole was pooped out from the trip home and slept for a good part of the evening. He's as happy to be home as we are to have him home.

Our first night went great - I still have to wake them up every three hours to eat so by the time we feed and diaper both, it's about an hour and a half process. Thank goodness I am an easy sleeper and I can go right back to sleep the minute my head hits the pillow. I'm still running on adrenaline now so the lack of sleep will take a while to catch up with me I think.

We have an oxygen machine in the living room - and it sounds like a lawnmower is running in the house. It's pretty funny actually. It has to be on all of the time so the boys will certainly get used to constant noise - which is a great thing! The oxygen hose is long enough to go everywhere in the house so although Cole is hooked up 100% of the time, he can hang with us wherever we are. It will be a bit of an adjustment but we're getting the hang of it pretty quick. The apnea monitor carts around with us too everywhere we go - it's a box about the size of a 12 pack of beer and it has a shoulder strap on it. It has become my extra appendage. So far, we've had several "loose lead" alarms which make me want to chuck the thing out the window, after I calm down from the initial alarm scare. Luckily, we haven't had any real alarms yet other than a couple of apnea episodes that self resolved due to his reflux. It's actually a good thing though, since having the monitor allows me to sleep at night since it will beep if he has a problem.

Anyway, here are a few photos from yesterday of Cole. He's a happy camper, that is for sure!








HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE - WE ALL HAVE SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR. SAFE TRAVELS IF YOU'RE TRAVELING. ENJOY YOUR FAMILIES AND ALL OF THE GOODIES - GOD BLESS!

Today's the day!

Well, Cole had a great night for his last night in the NICU. He's ready and waiting to come home. I talked to our nurse this morning and she said he was all bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to go!

As I sit here and wait for the oxygen man to arrive, I'm blubbering my eyes out just thinking about how long we've waited for this day. It's almost surreal that after today, we don't have to go to the hospital any more. We can pick up and hug our kids anytime we want since they will be under our roof. We'll be like a normal family now!

The emotions running around in my head are all over the place. I'm so thankful for this day. Walking out of NICU and the hospital is going to be bittersweet. I'll miss my new friends there. They were our support system. And some of the babies and their parents who we are leaving behind will be missed so much. Jack and his parents are hopefully close behind and will be home soon too. But it's so hard to leave them there. We're having such a special day and it breaks my heart that they will be there watching us leave and they have to stay...

The daily trips to the hospital are the only thing I have known since June, when I was admitted. Now I get to be home and actually be a Mom. It's time. It's been far too long - but it's funny, when you're doing it, you don't look at it that way. You just rally and do what you have to do. So many families are in our same shoes and they do the same. You take it one day at a time. Until your stay is over and the day you've waited for finally arrives. It's a surreal feeling. As much as you think about the day that you'll have your baby(ies) home finally, you never get your heart set on it. Because it can be taken away so quick. I'll believe it when Cole is sitting in his car seat in the back of my truck. Then I'll accept that he's really coming home.

I'll never ever be able to explain how thankful we are for the NICU staff. Each and every one of the people that work in NICU are amazing. The care was exceptional, support never ending and friendships so comforting. Nurses are nurses because they want to care for others - but they, like teachers, are so under appreciated. We owe the lives of our beautiful children to the nurses. They got us all where we are today. And I'm not sure that nurses look at it like that. All of them need to know that we will feel forever indebted to them for their gift to our family. It's hard to put into words.

Better get going and pack up Cole's bag with his coming home outfit and stuff. We're really bringing this baby home. I'm still reeling that it's finally here. More later...

It's the boys DUE DATE!

Can you believe that today is the day that the babies were actually due to be born? As I sit here in disbelief that they really weren't even supposed to be here until today, I cannot believe what the last 12 weeks have brought. Today is Day #83 of life for the boys - and tomorrow they will be exactly 12 weeks old (in weeks). Next week they will be 3 months old already. That is just amazing to me.

And the best part? COLE COMES HOME TOMORROW! He only has one more wake up in the NICU and then he gets to come home & sleep in his own bed and wear his own jammies! And he gets to be with his brother again too - I've wondered so much if they know that they have been separated since birth. I can't wait to get them back together again and let them look at each other!

It's a day full of reflection for us - thinking back to what brought us to this place is pretty unbelievable. Tonight will be our last night visit to the hospital in 83 days. Tomorrow will be our last drive to the hospital to visit the NICU. A rough calculation of trips made is over 220 trips; considering that we usually did 3 trips per day. I think I kept the valet company in business at the hospital!

I can't help but think about Baby Cal though. As excited as I am that this NICU journey is coming to a close and our family will be together at last, it is also a reminder that we are missing one of our team members. He is with us in spirit and will always watch over all of us - we know that. But seeing only two of everything when there should have been three is sad for me. I miss him a lot.

Today will be a busy day getting things ready for Baby Cole's homecoming. We have lots of training to do on the monitors and oxygen equipment, as well as getting prescriptions filled and follow up doctors appointments scheduled for later in the week. It will all get done and I assure you, you haven't seen this big of a smile on my face in quite some time. The day we've been waiting for is just around the corner. I can hardly believe it.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support. Pictures will follow of the big day - and we'll keep the updates coming. Until then, wish us luck that Cole stays healthy for one more day so we can get him out of there! Love to all.

We're still growing bigger every day...

And much to Mommy's surprise, JD is over 7 pounds now! Yikes! At his check up today, he tipped the scale at 7lb, 6 oz (with a full poopy diaper and a onesie on). He's growing like a weed. I know 7 pounds probably sounds like small potatos to most of you but after seeing these guys at 2 pounds, 7 pounds is huge!

And Cole is too! He actually hit the 5 pound mark last night - and his cheeks are looking chubbier than ever now. It's so amazing that these two little guys have come so far - they look like real babies now. Cole has taken all of his feedings by bottle for the last 48 hours now so he's got bottle feeding mastered we think. Now we work on the oxygen weaning and we're ready to go. There is talk of coming home next week with him on oxygen. Not so sure how we feel about that yet but we'll wait through the weekend and then make a decision about whether to bring him home with oxygen or leave him a bit longer. I think you know which way I'm leaning on this one ~ it's time for him to be home. I don't care what it takes at this point.

We're Coasting along...

Just a quick update. Cole is coasting right along for now - no major changes. He has taken all of his bottles now for over 24 hours so that is a great milestone. They will probably pull his feeding tube in the next couple of days if he keeps this up. That should make it easier for him to eat when the tube is removed. It should also help his reflux.

He's still on oxygen and we're weaning him down slowly again. There is talk of a homecoming next week but we are just taking it one day at a time. We don't want him home until he's ready to be here so we're trying to be as patient as we can. He's almost to 5 pounds now - last night he was 4lb, 14.4 oz. Perhaps he'll hit FIVE pounds tonight.

All else is going well on the homefront. We're loving the nanny - she's working out wonderfully. She adores JD and it appears that he is very relaxed and content with her. I feel very lucky that so far this is working out so well.

Until tomorrow...g'night all.