We are 3 months old today...

As I sit and look at our little boys, I'm nothing short of amazed. How on earth did those little 2 pounders turn into real little babies? Amazing. Although I never doubted that they would be normal babies someday, it was hard to picture what they would look like when they started to grow up. I still sit each day and stare at them in amazement...

Cole at 3 months old



JD at 3 months old



They both are thriving so well at home - and before we know it, they will be walking and talking. I'm doing my best to savor every, single moment.

At this point in their lives, they are developing more each day. They are starting to smile more. They are also starting to be awake much longer and stay alert. They look around much more and are visibly stimulated by music, noise and play. They are certainly opinionated about things now - Cole is a bit more "opinionated" than JD is. He makes his likes and dislikes known right away. When he's hungry, watch your fingers because he might just eat them if they get into his mouth! He loves to eat and does so with fury. Keep him fed, and he's a happy camper.

JD is a bit more patient; and absolutely loves his sleep! As evidenced by his photo, he's apparently storing nuts for the winter in his cheeks. Both boys love to snuggle and can't get enough of hugs and kisses.

We are so incredibly proud of our boys - they have come such a long way. With the holiday season upon us, it's a neat time to be able to reflect on where we've been and how far we've come. So much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to. We are lucky parents to have such wonderful, special Children. I feel so blessed each and every day. I hope I never forget this feeling and I also hope that I never, ever take our Sons for granted. They are special little people and I don't think I've ever loved something this much - ever.

Pucki & Gucki have arrived!

Who, you ask, are Pucki & Gucki? Well, you see, they are Santa's elves who have visited our family after Thanksgiving since I can remember. These two little Santa's helpers arrive on Thanksgiving Eve and stay until Santa comes on Christmas Eve and they can hop a ride back in the sleigh to the North Pole with him. After that time, their annual duty is done - until the next year.

Here they are, the cute little guys.


Pucki and Gucki come to watch the children and make sure that they are good and deserving of presents from Santa. They move about the house at will, and sometimes can be found to have left crumbs of food around the house or have changed their stance. They both are Steif Elves from Germany, purchased many years ago by my Grandparents - they stand about 7" tall and they have plastic faces and cloth/felt bodies. Their little eyes are painted on and I swear to this day, they follow you around the room when you look at them! They are always watching.

For years, my brother and I anxiously awaited Thanksgiving since the elves were coming. They would arrive and be perched on the clock or the Christmas wreath that hung on the hearth. We would run downstairs in the morning and there they were. And once they arrived, absolutely no more fighting. We were on our best behavior until Christmas. If we had to fight amongst each other, it was very quietly. And we would always be sure to write out our Christmas lists (in very small print) and fold them small enough so they would fit in the elves pouches. They would surely take them directly to Santa and we would be more likely to get what we wanted for Christmas.

The best part was that there was a BIG Gucki at our Grammy's house. So if we went there, we had to be extra good! He was the mac daddy Gucki. Needless to say, he has now moved to my Mom's house, the current Grammy. And my brother also has a Pucki and a Gucki - so the cousins will both have their own elves! Hat's off to whoever created this idea - it's ingenious. Not only is it a fun tradition for the kids, but anything to make kids behave over the holidays is one great idea.

I've waited many years to be able to share this tradition with my children - it's one of my fondest memories of childhood. I can't wait until the boys understand the story - and they can live that fun dream of being so special that Santa's elves actually come and stay at their house for a whole momth before Christmas! What a privelege! And what a way to keep them minding their p's & q's during such an exciting, crazy time for kids. In the meantime, until they are big enough to understand, we'll just continue to BELIEVE ourselves, in the magic of Christmas. It's much more fun that way!

Preemie Poem

(Thanks to Debbi - a fellow preemie Mom and a GREAT cheerleader!)

Preemie babies are angels sent from above, sent earlyto earth on a mission of love. They help us remember what life really means, not cars, not houses, not other expensive things.

They remind us of dreams for peace in our life and bring us together, husband and wife, aunts and uncles and daughters and sons. Leaving in the past any hurts we have done.

They remind us our touch can be used for good, to heal a small life when nothing else could. With their arrival of tiny hands and little feet, the world's not the same: it's a little more sweet.

(As seen published at the Connecticut Children's Medical Center NICU)

Our First Tandem Outing!

What a weekend! And the weather is so awesome - we were able to get the boys out for a long walk yesterday and today. They really enjoyed the fresh air - plus, it made them sleep extra well last night...always a plus!



We had a doctors appointment yesterday and Cole is up to 5 lb,11 oz now - he left the hospital at 5 lb,1 oz so he's growing well. JD is up to 8 lb,1 oz - apparently he's growing well too! Cole is actually eating like a champ. He's eating more than his brother is and in record time. JD has turned into quite the slow poke eater.

We feel so blessed that the boys are doing so well. Keep it up little guys! Hope you all are enjoying your Thanksgiving weekend. I know that we've had nothing but FOOTBALL on all weekend around here - the boys have been christened into the sports family! Can we just reiterate how nice it has been not to have to go to the hospital any longer?

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
Words will never be able to express how thankful we are for this day. You all have been such an instrumental part in getting us this far and we can never thank you enough for that. This is truly the best Thanksgiving ever in our book; what a special day.

Here are a few photos of our little turkey's;

Turkey #1 (Cole)



Turkey #2 (JD) - He ate too much turkey and the triptofan has started to kick in!





And here's a photo of the two of them side by side from yesterday. It never ceases to amaze me how different they look, yet they share so many of the same mannerisms. True Brothers!

We're Home (sorry for the delay!)

Whew...we made it!



We are knee deep in bottles and burp cloths and I LOVE IT! Daddy had to go to work today so Grammy and Great Aunt Kathy are here with me and we're watching babies eat sleep and poop. Oh how I've waited for this day.

It was an uneventful homecoming which is a good thing. We got home around 3pm yesterday and I spent the first hour just staring at the boys sitting in their seats together. JD was wide awake and not at all phased by Cole's arrival. Cole was pooped out from the trip home and slept for a good part of the evening. He's as happy to be home as we are to have him home.

Our first night went great - I still have to wake them up every three hours to eat so by the time we feed and diaper both, it's about an hour and a half process. Thank goodness I am an easy sleeper and I can go right back to sleep the minute my head hits the pillow. I'm still running on adrenaline now so the lack of sleep will take a while to catch up with me I think.

We have an oxygen machine in the living room - and it sounds like a lawnmower is running in the house. It's pretty funny actually. It has to be on all of the time so the boys will certainly get used to constant noise - which is a great thing! The oxygen hose is long enough to go everywhere in the house so although Cole is hooked up 100% of the time, he can hang with us wherever we are. It will be a bit of an adjustment but we're getting the hang of it pretty quick. The apnea monitor carts around with us too everywhere we go - it's a box about the size of a 12 pack of beer and it has a shoulder strap on it. It has become my extra appendage. So far, we've had several "loose lead" alarms which make me want to chuck the thing out the window, after I calm down from the initial alarm scare. Luckily, we haven't had any real alarms yet other than a couple of apnea episodes that self resolved due to his reflux. It's actually a good thing though, since having the monitor allows me to sleep at night since it will beep if he has a problem.

Anyway, here are a few photos from yesterday of Cole. He's a happy camper, that is for sure!








HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE - WE ALL HAVE SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR. SAFE TRAVELS IF YOU'RE TRAVELING. ENJOY YOUR FAMILIES AND ALL OF THE GOODIES - GOD BLESS!

Today's the day!

Well, Cole had a great night for his last night in the NICU. He's ready and waiting to come home. I talked to our nurse this morning and she said he was all bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to go!

As I sit here and wait for the oxygen man to arrive, I'm blubbering my eyes out just thinking about how long we've waited for this day. It's almost surreal that after today, we don't have to go to the hospital any more. We can pick up and hug our kids anytime we want since they will be under our roof. We'll be like a normal family now!

The emotions running around in my head are all over the place. I'm so thankful for this day. Walking out of NICU and the hospital is going to be bittersweet. I'll miss my new friends there. They were our support system. And some of the babies and their parents who we are leaving behind will be missed so much. Jack and his parents are hopefully close behind and will be home soon too. But it's so hard to leave them there. We're having such a special day and it breaks my heart that they will be there watching us leave and they have to stay...

The daily trips to the hospital are the only thing I have known since June, when I was admitted. Now I get to be home and actually be a Mom. It's time. It's been far too long - but it's funny, when you're doing it, you don't look at it that way. You just rally and do what you have to do. So many families are in our same shoes and they do the same. You take it one day at a time. Until your stay is over and the day you've waited for finally arrives. It's a surreal feeling. As much as you think about the day that you'll have your baby(ies) home finally, you never get your heart set on it. Because it can be taken away so quick. I'll believe it when Cole is sitting in his car seat in the back of my truck. Then I'll accept that he's really coming home.

I'll never ever be able to explain how thankful we are for the NICU staff. Each and every one of the people that work in NICU are amazing. The care was exceptional, support never ending and friendships so comforting. Nurses are nurses because they want to care for others - but they, like teachers, are so under appreciated. We owe the lives of our beautiful children to the nurses. They got us all where we are today. And I'm not sure that nurses look at it like that. All of them need to know that we will feel forever indebted to them for their gift to our family. It's hard to put into words.

Better get going and pack up Cole's bag with his coming home outfit and stuff. We're really bringing this baby home. I'm still reeling that it's finally here. More later...

It's the boys DUE DATE!

Can you believe that today is the day that the babies were actually due to be born? As I sit here in disbelief that they really weren't even supposed to be here until today, I cannot believe what the last 12 weeks have brought. Today is Day #83 of life for the boys - and tomorrow they will be exactly 12 weeks old (in weeks). Next week they will be 3 months old already. That is just amazing to me.

And the best part? COLE COMES HOME TOMORROW! He only has one more wake up in the NICU and then he gets to come home & sleep in his own bed and wear his own jammies! And he gets to be with his brother again too - I've wondered so much if they know that they have been separated since birth. I can't wait to get them back together again and let them look at each other!

It's a day full of reflection for us - thinking back to what brought us to this place is pretty unbelievable. Tonight will be our last night visit to the hospital in 83 days. Tomorrow will be our last drive to the hospital to visit the NICU. A rough calculation of trips made is over 220 trips; considering that we usually did 3 trips per day. I think I kept the valet company in business at the hospital!

I can't help but think about Baby Cal though. As excited as I am that this NICU journey is coming to a close and our family will be together at last, it is also a reminder that we are missing one of our team members. He is with us in spirit and will always watch over all of us - we know that. But seeing only two of everything when there should have been three is sad for me. I miss him a lot.

Today will be a busy day getting things ready for Baby Cole's homecoming. We have lots of training to do on the monitors and oxygen equipment, as well as getting prescriptions filled and follow up doctors appointments scheduled for later in the week. It will all get done and I assure you, you haven't seen this big of a smile on my face in quite some time. The day we've been waiting for is just around the corner. I can hardly believe it.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support. Pictures will follow of the big day - and we'll keep the updates coming. Until then, wish us luck that Cole stays healthy for one more day so we can get him out of there! Love to all.

We're still growing bigger every day...

And much to Mommy's surprise, JD is over 7 pounds now! Yikes! At his check up today, he tipped the scale at 7lb, 6 oz (with a full poopy diaper and a onesie on). He's growing like a weed. I know 7 pounds probably sounds like small potatos to most of you but after seeing these guys at 2 pounds, 7 pounds is huge!

And Cole is too! He actually hit the 5 pound mark last night - and his cheeks are looking chubbier than ever now. It's so amazing that these two little guys have come so far - they look like real babies now. Cole has taken all of his feedings by bottle for the last 48 hours now so he's got bottle feeding mastered we think. Now we work on the oxygen weaning and we're ready to go. There is talk of coming home next week with him on oxygen. Not so sure how we feel about that yet but we'll wait through the weekend and then make a decision about whether to bring him home with oxygen or leave him a bit longer. I think you know which way I'm leaning on this one ~ it's time for him to be home. I don't care what it takes at this point.

We're Coasting along...

Just a quick update. Cole is coasting right along for now - no major changes. He has taken all of his bottles now for over 24 hours so that is a great milestone. They will probably pull his feeding tube in the next couple of days if he keeps this up. That should make it easier for him to eat when the tube is removed. It should also help his reflux.

He's still on oxygen and we're weaning him down slowly again. There is talk of a homecoming next week but we are just taking it one day at a time. We don't want him home until he's ready to be here so we're trying to be as patient as we can. He's almost to 5 pounds now - last night he was 4lb, 14.4 oz. Perhaps he'll hit FIVE pounds tonight.

All else is going well on the homefront. We're loving the nanny - she's working out wonderfully. She adores JD and it appears that he is very relaxed and content with her. I feel very lucky that so far this is working out so well.

Until tomorrow...g'night all.

New NICU, here we come!

WOW, what an emotional day. Ever have one of those days that you think will just be a normal day and whammo, it smacks you in the face like a ton of bricks? I think I cried more today than I have in several weeks. I'm sure it was a bit of denial that we really weren't going to make it to the new unit because we would be home by then and low and behold, here we are. It also is such a huge day for our NICU nurses and family and everyone was just glowing in excitement and so proud of the new place.

They moved the babies over according to seniority - which I thought was very cool. Little Baby Alaina (born at 1lb, 9 oz) was the leader of the pack. Then Cole was second, and his little friend Jack was right behind him. Sadly, I missed Cole's transfer but I arrived minutes after he had been wheeled into his new room. I walked in behind Jack and his Mom, through the line of cheering nurses that lined the hallway as each of the babies arrived to the new unit. Camera's were flashing and all of the welcoming nurses were clapping. It was a day to remember for sure.

The rooms are awesome - Cole is the first patient in Room 232. I have posted a few pictures of his new place. It took a couple of hours for the babies to settle down - many of them were overwhelmed by the noise and chaos during the move, Cole included. I stayed with him for a few hours until he settled in. Of course, I'll be back tonight as soon as the doors open at 8pm.

One of the coolest things is that there was a handmade quilt in his room when we arrived. It was made by an organization called The Angel Quilt Project. This wonderful organization makes quilts for NICU units, Childrens cancer units and regional Burn centers. The man who started the organization back in 2000 did so to let parents of premature children know that there are people out in the world who have faced the same conditions that we are facing now. The quilt is a gift for us to keep after we leave the hospital. All that they ask in return is a photo of our baby with the quilt for their scrapbook. You can see the quilt hanging on the chair in the room photo. It was specially selected for Cole by the nurses because of it's sports theme. It's cross stitched in the center and has a little baseball player on it. We will treasure it forever and Cole will always know how special it is.





And here is Cole, all settled in.

Mission Impossible

Check out the link to Jack's blog for the latest plottings for escape by Jack and Cole...

http://everythingaboutjack.blogspot.com/

Ready for the big move!

We're ready to move to the new unit tomorrow - moving time is 10:00 am so by this time tomorrow, we'll be all settled in. I'll give a good update tomorrow but for now, all is well.

Cole is hanging in there - sadly, they had to move his IV to his head today which is tough to see. But they tell us that it actually is much more comfy for the babies there since it's not always getting bumped and pulled. Only 6 more days on the antibiotics and then the IV gets pulled. It sure looks scary though. Until that comes out, we will not be taking any more photos of Cole - he wouldn't appreciate that too much.

Here are a few snaps from earlier today though - see any resemblance?

Cole



JD

We're still chuggin' along

Well, as of 2am this morning, Cole was taken off of his oxygen again. He appears to be doing well so far without it so that is a great thing! He's eating much better now and has taken a couple of bottles from both C. & I. He actually wakes up crying due to hunger which is a good sign. He's weighing in at about 4 lb, 10 oz now. Hoping for a significant weight gain this week. Since he got sick, he's been staying about the same weight. I'm actually very thankful for that since most of the time when these little guys get sick, they actually lose weight.

JD is doing great at home. He eats like a champ and sleeps straight through to his next feed. I wake him up every 3 hours to eat. He's eating a little over 2 ounces right now. I think he's probably almost 7 pounds now - he's growing so fast. He's already out of his preemie clothes and almost out of preemie diapers. It doesn't take long! He loves to be in his swing - but most of all, he loves to sleep on Daddy's chest. He's getting spoiled already - imagine that. He's a pacifier fiend and seems to be happy as a clam all of the time. We are truly blessed.

All of the kids are moving to the new NICU on Tuesday so that will be an adventure. I can't imagine the planning that is involved in moving 24+ babies in critical care to a new area. I am bummed that we have to go since I was hoping we would all be home by then but it's going to be awesome to hang in the new NICU unit for a short time. We'll have our own private room, with a flat screen tv, which is pretty awesome. The rooms are beautiful and it will be much more quiet and restful for Cole. I'll try to take some pictures of his new place once we get moved in. We're hoping to have a room connected to or near our friends - Jack's parents. We've developed a nice bond having gone through so much at the same time. We'll miss them so much after we leave the little room we're in now!

As of now, we have a few milestones to make before our homecoming. 1) Cole needs to continue off of his oxygen with no episodes (A's & B's) for at least 5 days. 2) He also needs to be able to take 8 full bottles before they will remove his feeding tube. Once the tube comes out, he's pretty much ready to come home. 3) He is still on antibiotics for his infection and I believe that those should end on the 16th. Those are given by IV so he can't continue on them at home unfortunately. That just means we have to stay until they are finished.

It will be questionable whether he will come home with a monitor or not. We have mixed feelings about that but will go with whatever is the safest and best for him of course. It will be a bit nerve wracking either way but I know in just a couple of days after he gets home, he'll just take off and thrive, just like JD did.

We've got lots of follow up appointments with the boys over the next couple of weeks for their hearing, eyes, shots etc. I've gone solo to the doc with JD and it was easy but thinking about taking two of them is a whole new ball game. Luckily I'll have helpers! They are scheduled to be circumcized by a urologist the week of Thanksgiving so we'll hope that Cole is home by then so they can give each other the moral support they need for such a procedure.

Our nanny starts tomorrow so that will be good - she is a Chilean girl who has been working for one of my friends for a few years. We're sharing her during the week so I'll have her from 9:15 - 2:45 each day. She will put Suze's kids on the bus and get them off of the bus in the pm so I have her in between. I'm sure she will be a great help. Once the boys are home and stable, I'll work on my return to work plan. I'm going back to work after the holidays so need to figure out logistics for the boys. It's just so hard to plan right now, not knowing what Cole's needs will be etc.

That's about it for today. Going to grab some dinner before my night visit with Cole. Hope you all enjoyed the weekend - until tomorrow...

JD contemplates how to get his brother home...

I think I can, I think I can....

NICU can be fun!

It was Cole's turn today to play on the swing ~ the nurses hooked him up today with the swing as a special treat to make him feel better. Thanks for sharing Jack!



And he looks pretty content...

We're back on the upswing...

We're headed back in the right direction I think. Cole looked and acted a little more like himself today but he's not quite back to normal yet. He's getting more feisty again, which is a great sign. He's acting hungry now and taking all of his bottles again.

His nurse yesterday switched him to a special bottle (it's called a Haberman bottle). This bottle is actually much easier for him since it allows us to regulate the flow so he doesn't get flooded with milk. He has had a tough time using a regular bottle because it flows too fast for him so this has enabled him to eat much easier, without exerting so much energy trying to keep from drowning in milk.

His oxygen is weaning back down now and his antibiotics are in full force. He's redder than red from his blood transfusion but hopefully his color will even out again soon. He gives a new meaning to getting "red in the face". His whole body is beet red!

Hopefully by the end of the weekend, he'll have the infection kicked, his oxygen off and his eating perfected. Then we just work toward homecoming again. He's a fighter and he'll never give up! Thanks for your continued prayers, wonderful notes and well wishes. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Quick Update...

It's been another tough day for Baby Cole. He was not interested in eating too much today so most of his feeds were done by gavage (tube). This is OK for now - he's still getting the calories etc. it's just that he didn't take it by bottle. Temporary condition.

Secondly, his blood culture came back positive which means that he has another blood infection. He had this a long time ago and it was successfully taken care of by antibiotics. They have started IV antibiotics again and surely it will cure the infection. Even though he received a blood transfusion yesterday, they still need to treat the infection aggressively so it doesn't knock him down too much. He also has a bacteria growing in his nose which is being treated by nebulizer/inhaler. This should resolve quickly as well.

He is still very out of sorts and not himself. But we're hoping that by tomorrow he'll start feeling better. The oxygen is still on for now - which just makes it easier for him to rest so he can regain his strength. His eyes are still very swollen today from his eye exam late yesterday - which just makes him look a bit worse than he really is.

It's so hard to see him down and out like this - I just need to keep the faith that he'll pull out of this soon and we won't be too far behind on our milestone homecoming date of Thanksgiving. None of his issues are life threatening right now so I feel thankful that everything is fixable. God willing, we'll all be home together by Turkey Day.

Going to make bottles, get JD's jammies on and hit the sack. Been a long emotional day and we need to be strong for tomorrow! G'Night all.

Update on the Car Seat Video

Another friend just sent this to me after reading my blog entry today...

There's a link to a video on YouTube spreading like wildfire today. It was made by a March '06 mom who lost her 3 yr old ds last year in a car crash and in the video she's pushing for using car seats with harnesses past 40 lbs. (specifically the Britax Regent).

While I think that extended harnessing is a great idea using car seats with higher weight limit harnesses, her video is a bit confusing in that it suggests that you can use lower LATCH anchors to 80 lbs. You must stop using the lower LATCH anchors at 48 lbs. and with some vehicles and car seats, it's 40 lbs. (check the owner's manual). Then you use the seat belt for installation.

The woman who sent this is a safety instructor and the head of the safety tips board for Baby Center.

I think I can, I think I can (says Cole)

Cole is still chuggin' right along today. But we've taken a few steps back. I guess this is what is known as the "preemie shuffle". They all tell me that this is normal so I'll go with that I suppose. Nothing like being a few days from coming home and getting put back in our place for getting a bit too cocky. Don't we know better than this by now? I guess we'll be seeing the new NICU for a few days next week. (BTW, did any of you Capital readers see the article last night on the new NICU unit?).

Cole had another blood transfusion today which hopefully will perk him back up. His hematocrit number was low, which means that his body wasn't producing enough red blood cells to keep things running efficiently. They did another round of blood work this morning and everything came back fine again with regard to any infection or anything scary. Relief. So, this momentary set back appears to be the cause of his low RBC count, and the fact that they took him off of the caffeine. Both of these things are easy fixes so hopefully in the next day or two, he'll be back to his old self. I spent a few hours with him today and he just slept and enjoyed some Mommy time. Hopefully that is just what the doctor ordered!

On a separate subject, a dear friend sent the following link to me today. Rather than forward out the email to a bunch of people, I figured that posting it on my blog would reach all of those people that I would want to make sure saw this. Perhaps you have already seen it but a 2nd reminder can never hurt.

This is a sad video but it's important for all the moms and soon-to-be moms to know about this! It's a G rated video...no gore. It's important & I hope that all of you can take a few minutes to view it and heed the advice. There's nothing more important than protecting our most precious kids.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azgBhZfcqaQ

Back on the rollercoaster

Yep, you read right! We're back on the NICU rollercoaster. I followed the xray machine into the NICU unit when I arrived there this morning - little did I know it was headed to my Son's bedside for an xray. It appears that Cole did not like having his caffiene taken away and he's gone back to having some apnea episodes. If you might recall, when they did the boys sleep study a while back, he was diagnosed with central apnea which means that it's just a maturity thing and he will grow out of it. Apparently he's not quite ready to grow out of it and still needs the caffeine/stimulant support to remind his body to breathe. As a result of his apnic episodes today, he was put back on oxygen again. I hated to see him lose all that ground that he gained over the last several days - but I guess that's all part of the plan.

That said, in order to be proactive and make sure that he wasn't sick or fighting an infection, they ran bloodwork and did a lung xray. All came back clean as a whistle so they have determined that it's simply the caffeine that needs to be restarted. Phew. Within a day or two, he should be back to where he was without oxygen and no random episodes. Poor little guy - he was so tired from working so hard to keep his oxygenation up. We had a relaxing visit and I pep talked him as best as I could. I plan to read him our favorite book again tonight - "I think I can".

So, onward we go. Hopefully we've only been set back a few days and we're going to get this little guy back on track soon. He's trying his best and that's all we can ask right? Thanks for your continued prayers!

11:11

Some of you may know about my obsession with seeing 11:11 on clocks very frequently. It happens so often, and has been happening for a few years, on almost a daily basis; and sometimes I'll see multiple clocks at the same time that say 11:11. The date seems to creep up in other ways too - it's just plain weird! Everywhere I go, I see 11:11. And the strange thing is, that it happens to Chuck too quite often. We've always thought it was very odd. Whenever I would see 11:11, I would say "11:11, make a wish" and you know very well what I would wish for. I would kiss the clock and wish that we would be lucky enough to have a family someday, after all of our struggles.

I have looked up the significance of 11:11 and it is a true phenomenon. There are biblical associations to it, as well as fertility associations within the biblical references. I've always thought that was a bit odd. As we know, there are NO coincidences - so this 11:11 phenomenon means something in my life; I'm just not quite sure what.

When JD came home a couple of weeks ago from the hospital, I was thinking about when Cole might come home after him. I began thinking about the dates. And then I realized that it would be right around the right time frame that he came home around 11/11. And we're right on target. Is that what all of these 11/11 sightings have been leading up to? The day that my family is reunited and home together? We'll see won't we?

Anyone else experience this 11/11 phenomenon? I'm sure I'm not the only one!

"He's your Miracle Baby"

Those are the words recently said to me by the nurse who took care of Cole on his first day of life. I had never asked too much about Cole's condition at birth, for fear of what I might hear I guess. The other day, I asked some questions that I had never been able to bring myself to ask. I was very shocked at the response I got. No wonder I didn't ask before this!

Cindy and Chona were the boys first two nurses; they were wonderful to Chuck that day. They explained so much of what they were doing to Cole & JDand made him feel comfortable that the boys were in good hands and were stable. Very comforting for a first time Dad, with two babies in the NICU. Little did I know, they had also made him aware of Cole's very scary prognosis. He was on the edge of living. Thank goodness nobody told me that or let on any such thing.

Not once did I ever have a doubt that he would make it. I will admit, I often worried about his long term damage from going through as much as he did. But never did I lose hope or faith that he would grow and we would take him home. I just didn't know when that might be. When I asked why they didn't tell me that, she of course said, "why would we do that? Your job as a Mom is to believe in your kids and love them enough to push them through anything!". How right she was.

Cole was VERY sick - and mostly due to the twin to twin transfusion syndrome that was going on in utero between he and Calvin. Nobody knew the extent of this issue until after they were born. And none of the NICU staff thought he would make it. He was greatly compromised at birth - he was severely anemic, which affected most of his organs in one way or another. He was tiny and he was weak. But he fought his little heart out and look at him today. When I arrived this morning, this little precious face, with wide eyes, greeted me. It just made me cry immediately and once again, reminded me to thank God for this precious little life that has blessed us.



I can tell already that his personality is going to be one of a fighter. He'll be one who never gives up. He'll be one who works hard for everything he will be. He'll always know that he had an identical brother who carried them through as long as he could. He will always be our hero ~ and we'll never take life for granted again. He is truly our Miracle Baby.

Weekend Updates...

Well, I published a post last night but somehow it got lost. Suffice to say that I was sounding pretty negative anyway so it's a good thing that it got lost in cyberspace. You don't need to hear me rant. After getting two new room mates in our TINY room (twin girls arrived last night, for a total of 4 babies in an 8 x 12 room), I was at the end of my rope. In our small room, there were FOUR babies in cribs/isoletes, THREE nurses, TWO sets of parents, THREE rocking chairs and a partridge in a pear tree. This hospital gig is getting the best of me. But after getting a renewed plan for Cole, my attitude is back on track.

Here's the weekend scoop. First, I will say that Cole is doing excellent and getting the hang of this feeding thing finally. We have a plan for this week and that is that he is home within the next FIVE days. That means by the end of the week, we might have both boys home finally!

They have stopped Cole's caffeine to see how he does without it. Hopefully he'll be fine and will not start having any episodes (A's & B's). He's been episode free for a couple of weeks now so we're hopeful that he will continue with that trend. Assuming that he goes 5 days without any significant "events" and he's eating 8 bottles per day, we're out of there!

JD continues to do great too at home. He loves being here at home and is eating like a champ (as evidenced by the photos below of his chipmunk cheeks). We have discovered an uncanny resemblance between JD and my baby pictures. He's definitely got lots of the Leach side in him. I still haven't stopped staring at him endlessly.

The new NICU unit at AAMC was unveiled today and it's absolutely beautiful. And it's so different from the existing NICU unit. The patients will not be moved until 11/14 which is still 9 days away so with any luck, we will NOT have a chance to reside in the new unit. But suffice to say, for any of you NICU mom's who have been at AAMC, you would be SO impressed. Words cannot even describe how awesome it is. It's huge! And it has individual rooms for each patient, complete with a sink area, flat screen tv and new kangaroo chairs. It's so welcoming and calming - and an all together different philosophy of care. It is MUCH more patient friendly and so great for privacy for the families. It's just awesome. Although I would rather have my baby Cole home any day, I am a bit sad that we may miss this new experience. The nurses are very excited and I hope that it's an easy transition for them all.

As the final discharge day nears, I have found myself feeling a bit nostalgic and sad - in a weird way. The nurses have become my extended family. And the daily hospital routine has become my life. Don't get me wrong, I welcome the change and the idea of getting our life into a routine with our new family. But I must say, it will be an adjustment. They say that anything you do for 21 days becomes a habit. Well, I would definitely call my hospital trips a "habit". I wake up knowing that I will be going there and seeing my baby. I was talking to Jack's Mom (our roomate) today and we both think it will be an odd adjustment when we don't have to go to the hospital any longer. It's amazing how that happens.

Thank you all for your continued thoughts, prayers and messages. We are getting close now and I can hardly believe it. Your support has been amazing and we certainly would not be where we are today without the love of our families and friends. We'll keep you posted as the week rolls along - I can't wait for the day when I can write and say "WE'RE HOME"!

Like Father Like Son

JD & Daddy had a fun boys day on Sunday - the first of MANY!

Go Redskins - beat the Cowboys!



Phew, that exciting game wore me out!

Big Boys!

Well, we've got a 4.4 pounder and a 5.10 pounder! Whoa! I'm happy to report that both boys are doing very well.

Cole is off of his oxygen completely and has been holding his own for a few days now - yay!!! And he's still working on getting better with his bottles. He's still being tube fed a few times a day and takes bottles as often as he can. He still gets tired very easily; and go figure, it's much easier to get tube fed right? It's a lot less work, that's for sure. Boys will be boys I guess. We're still looking at another week or so before he can come home I think. The new NICU unit at AAMC opens this weekend and they are transferring all of the patients on 11/14 - we're hoping that he's home before that so we don't get to experience the new unit...as beautiful as it will be, we would rather not have to see it! Here's Cole's 9 week picture.



We had JD's 2nd home visit today. The hospital sends a home nurse out twice a week after a NICU baby is released. He had a great report. He's gained 5.5 oz since Monday which is excellent. He's a little over 18" long and growing like a weed. We have another pediatrician appointment tomorrow. He's a joy to have home - a great baby and so much fun. He does a lot of sleeping, like preemies do but is spending more and more time awake each day. His wake time is full of coo's and smiles. He's as happy to be home as we are to finally have him home. He just misses his brother! Here is his 9 week photo, as taken at the photo shoot at Grammy's house earlier this week.



Thanks to both Grandmothers for your help this week in taking care of JD. I know that it's tough on you both (snicker, snicker). It's been a godsend to have you both available so that I am able to spend time with Cole each day. I do feel like he's getting jipped a bit since I can only visit for a few hours each day but I try to savor every moment with him. It's especially nice when I can get there for a feeding during the day too. THANK YOU!

We have a roommate in NICU that I want to introduce you to - his name is Jack. His Mom & Dad are awesome people and we've had some really fun and funny times lately during our visits. Baby Jack was born just 4 days after Cole & JD and he's gone through just about the same course of treatment as Cole has. They are about the same size and have the same spunky, no quit attitude. If you're interested, his Mom keeps a blog too and there is a very cute picture of him as Superman for halloween.

www.everythingaboutjack.blogspot.com

I can't tell you how great it is to have other NICU parents around to lighten the load. We've developed a nice friendship and I'm thankful that they ended up being our roommates. Remembering back to how worried I was about being in that "back room", it all works out for the best doesn't it? Check out Jack's blog if you have an interest.