On the bright side?

I've been contemplating writing all week - and for lack of better words, I have nothing positive to say at the moment so have held back. It's not generally my nature to be negative and a complainer (at least in public) so although my head is full of things to say, I'm not sure how to let it all out without being a total whiner...

It's been a rough week. But in retrospect, for me personally, I'm much better off than some of the co-workers I was surrounded by before they got let go. We had to terminate 4 people this week. Their lives turned upside down. I can hardly complain because that wouldn't be fair - in comparison to what THEY are dealing with. This "poor me" thing that I keep falling into is total b/s because these people just lost their jobs! Along with millions of other Americans. At least I still have my job, my family, my health, and a generally great life.

To say that the economic situation in this country sucks is an extreme understatement - and really, it's hard to imagine how bad it really is until it directly affects YOU in some way. I learned that the hard way - this week. I have a few friends who have felt the crunch for many months now - and it's been so hard watching them go through the uncertainty of what could be of their jobs. Not knowing the status of your job is one of the most stressful things anyone can go through. Your livelihood can be taken away from you at any moment - and it's out of your control.

I've been working at our family business for 16 years now. Over those years, we've been through our share of ups and downs - and we've ridden them all out and continued to be successful. Business has been good and we've survived the economic glitches along the way. Today, we're not so certain. It's the first time in the existence of our business that we have had to cut back to the point of losing employees - that, to me, is so scary. We're all taking pay cuts. We've cut back the extra's and trimmed all of the fat. And if in 30 days the economy doesn't improve to some extent, we're going to have to cut deeper. That means even less salary, more people lose their jobs - and the company gets smaller.

We made a decision this week to cancel our family vacation trip in April. I'm really sad. But we know it was the right decision for now. We couldn't justify spending the money on a lavish vacation, all things considered. It will wait - we'll go another time. Nonetheless, I'm still really sad about it. I must say, I'm glad the kids are still too little to understand what they are missing - that would make it even harder to explain why we had to cancel it.

I will say that despite the stress of my "real job", going home to my little guys makes it all ok. And I'm more thankful than ever now that I actually have 2 days at home with them during the week. Although my mind is totally preoccupied with work during the days I'm not in the office, I still get to spend time with my boys - something I treasure more than life itself. Playing with them, hearing their laughter and getting endless hugs and kisses is the best gift I could ask for. They keep me grounded and keep life in perspective on the toughest of days.

I miss my Mom, whose been gone all week on retreat. It's amazing how much I rely on that 5 minute phone call each day to check in. Love you Mom.

Thank God for the little people in my life, my husband (who has been on a golf vacation for the last 3 days) and for the gym. For those are my sanity for now. When Sunday rolls around and my right hand man is back, it will get yet a little bit easier again....until then, we're just trying to keep it as fun as we can, despite the bad parts. And I don't dare turn on the news any more - although tired of Diego, at least he smiles a lot and it's better than what the media has to offer these days....