Career & Motherhood = CHALLENGE

And I've never been one to walk away from a challenge! It's been a busy week and this challenge has officially kicked my butt this week. It's Friday - I have NO idea where the week went. Before I knew it, it was Friday and my alarm was beeping at 4:30 am. The week just flew by. And weekends are my favorite anyway - now I appreciate them even more - 2 FULL days with my babies! I made it - my first week back to work is almost behind me. The anticipation of it was much harder than doing it. I work with some great people. Most everyone was so kind when I came back and made me feel welcome again. One of the great benefits of working for a family based small company. I even got some cupcakes upon return!

Actually, my return to work has gone very smoothly - from both the emotional and logistical standpoint. Having such good home daycare makes all of the difference. My nanny has been with us since October. She knows us inside and out now. She's absolutely wonderful and the boys adore her. Leaving home in the morning is never easy but before I know it, I'm back home. Once I return home at 2:30, the chaos ensues and until 9pm, I'm running my arse off. I usually return home with my briefcase full of "homework", that I MUST get done before morning. I put the kids down, and off to work I go. But as you can imagine, I get my work done in 1/3 of the time I would if I tried to do it while the kids were up and/or while I'm at the office and getting interrupted by the daily business going on. That said, it seems to be working fairly efficiently for now - except for my sleep factor.

I've never been one to need oodles of sleep to function. I come by that honestly. My family is lucky like that. And thankfully, I can sleep anywhere, anytime - no insomnia tendencies here. So, once my head hits the pillow I'm out. Thank goodness. The hours I spend in bed, although short, are usually good quality sleep time. I just wonder how long 5-5.5 hours is going to work? Time will tell.

Back to the challenge of it all. This summer marks my 15 year anniversary with the company. It's my Dad's company and I came to work there the summer I graduated from college to make some extra money until I got accepted into the FBI. Believe that? I wanted to be an undercover FBI agent - they were in a hiring freeze at the time I got out of school. Anyway, we would have never thought that I would have made a career out of working for our family business since it was never even on my radar until I landed there by chance. I was given an amazing opportunity and worked my way slowly to where I am today. It's not often that people are given that chance to work for a family business and really make a career out of it. I have always been so thankful for that chance ~ and frankly, can't imagine doing anything else. I missed it like crazy while I was gone over the last few months. We have a very close family and thankfully, work has been a strong force in our lives but has not interfered with our family relationships.

For years before kids were on the forefront of our lives, my friends and I always discussed whether we would want to be stay at home Mom's or continue working. Not that everyone has a choice, but we always discussed it. And none of us knew what our future held anyway, but it was fun to chat about. It was always my contention that I would like to have a mix of both if I could. I didn't want to stop working. I love my career but would also want to be able to be with my kids a bit on a daily basis. I often wondered how it would all work out. And here I am. Trying to find that balance. It's hard. But it's working so far. I have enjoyed being back to work - I like the sense of responsibility, accomplishment and the challenge. It's definitely the right choice for me, for now. Part of the balancing act is getting used to not working at the office for a full day - it's certainly an adjustment. Most people would think "that's a great thing" and it is, but it's not as easy as one would think.

After all that we went through to have our children and get them here at home safely and healthy, this should be a piece of cake, right? My only hope is that I can slow it down enough to enjoy every moment. It's only going to get busier as the kids grow up and have their own activities going on. But I'm hopeful that once this routine gets perfected a bit, it won't be quite so stressful and the days won't fly by so fast; at least the time spent with the kids will be savored. Or maybe it will still fly by. But I will certainly do everything I can to enjoy each day and stop and smell the roses. For if you don't do that, what good is living life? There's so much to be enjoyed.

As one of my dear friends reminded me on the eve of my return to work "Most people never wish that they worked more hours at work, but they do wish that they had spent more time with their friends and family". What a keen reminder that is.